What do you think of when you think of a week filled with life? I think of a myriad of events, people, emotions and places. I don't think one task, one activity, one person or one place by itself can be life giving. If I think of all the things that have made my life worth living, it's the gorgeous mosaic that they create. Not the individual gemstones. By themselves, they're not enough. I woke up today feeling really excited the week was over. Not that it was a bad week. It was just full. Of stuff. It wasn't full of life. It was full of really joyful moments and feelings of accomplishment - which is only one of the beautiful gemstones that build life. I didn't meditate as much as I wanted. I didn't have time to have deep conversations or a walk outside. The most life giving moment I can think of is a facetime call from yesterday that wasn't even planned. It felt good too laugh so much but I actually ended up feeling bad about it right after because it had taken away time from my day and all the things I had planned on accomplishing. You know that feeling? That dark dread that overwhelms you when the day ends. The day is over, you think. Have I done enough? For me, my answer to that question can be so powerful. It can affect my state of mind - not only in the moment but for the rest of the week. If the answer is no, I am devastated. And if it's yes, I spend the rest of my time happy and relaxed. To an extent, that's normal - and maybe even helpful. The anticipation of taking a well deserved and satisfying rest with the fear of not spending my time well can motivate me to make the most out of each day. Out of life, even. But if the fear grows and turns into stress, it can be paralyzing. It can completely throw my well being off of equilibrium. I forget to do the work I enjoy with love, patience and compassion - the only way to have a week filled with life. Today is my rest day. So I fortunately don't have to deal with that guilty feeling as I lay down on the couch and do nothing. The more balance I have been trying to place into my routine, the more that fear stays under control and I can enjoy moments of rest just as much as I enjoy moments of productivity. I can think of at least three things that helped most. The first is obviously my rest days. They have been so helpful. I start the week with a new kind of energy after a rest day. And when I give myself permission to do nothing, I notice my creativity start tiptoeing back in… that child-like curiousity, freedom and excitement that we often lose in the day to day grind. I also believe it's because sometimes, I need a break from the things I love doing to remember why I enjoy them so much. The well-known you don't know what you have until it's gone phenomenon. Kind of related to rest days is my breaks from technology and social media. That's the only time my mind is genuinely resting and not being stimulated by a hundred things. If you want to read more about that, click here. The second is meditation and spirituality. This has been keeping me in a constant state of calm. On the days when everything seems to be falling apart, my spiritual practices remind me what's important. Having a clear perspective has helped me develop self-compassion as well. It teaches me to chose love and joy even when the situation isn't ideal. "Falling behind" one day isn't so terrible. Especially when we're in the middle of a pandemic… but our emotions can really get the best of us if we let them. Even the smallest inconvenience can become the worst pain. When your mind isn't turbulent by a storm of thoughts and feelings, you can think more logically and see your aggravations for what they really are. Having a spiritual practice takes some discipline and motivation - but I always remind myself why I do it and all that I have already gotten out of it, and it becomes a lot easier. You don't see the benefits right away - but you see them very clearly in the way you get through tough situations. An app I just started using and enjoy is Calm. The third is organizing. I don't think you have to be a super organized person - and the level of organization that you find helpful will vary. However, having time to plan the things that are important to you and think about the goals you want to achieve will make your days a lot more fulfilling and life-giving. For example, when I have a planned time to go out and have fun with people, it is really enjoyable. But when I leave the house with no plan about what I will do when I get back, and how I will use the rest of my week, it's a lot more difficult to enjoy myself because my mind is constantly having to make decisions and move between all my responsibilities and obligations. Sometimes even during the time I am supposed to be having fun.
Having a plan, with enough rest times and a spiritual practice in place will allow you to be fully present and joyful in everything you do. It takes time and I am by no means a life-expert… but the more I do these three things, the more reasons I find to keep doing so. This week's blog was inspired by Nathaniel Drew's YouTube channel.
Comments